Wanted to share (and remember) an emotional experience Gage and I had out on the tractor as we were baling hay the other day. Up until a few days ago, all Gage knew is that they were going to check his pacemaker. But you could tell he was getting suspicions of this so called checkup given the phone calls we were having. I could tell he was ready for the truth when he asked in his big boy voice (which we don't see very often), "What are they going to do to my pacemaker?" I explained the surgery he was going to have including going to sleep, cutting his chest open, taking out his old pacemaker, putting wires on his heart, and replacing the pacemaker with a bigger and better one. He started to cry a bit, but then said that was okay. He asked, "will there be staples in my chest like Sierra?" I just knodded yes. Then he asked, " is it okay to have a big heart?" At first I said yes it was good to have a big heart, it makes him big and strong. But he didn't buy that. "No, is it okay that my heart is bigger than my body?" That was when it got a bit more emotional. This time I just shook by head, no. "Will I have to get a new heart like Sierra and Lindsey?" "Probably... but not for a long time". We talked a bit more about it. You could see his mind processing it, and now ready to move on, for now. After a few moments, he climbed on my lap and we went back to driving the tractor....
As good as Sierra and the crew are doing, it has been tough to be away from my dear wife and best friend and kids for so long. I don't know other couples do it, but I know this guy missed is his wife and children. Megan has been a trooper. Many times she and Gage are here alone as I am out working at the office or on the ranch. You can tell she misses her sisters and mother. We know how blessed we are, we really do, it's just tough to be a part for so long. (By the way, I'm still bitter about missing out on the beach house, grrr)
Having said this, Gage and I leave Wednesday for our next adventure. Lindsey will be catching a ride back from Calif on the same day. Probably good to see Hunter before we leave, so Tara is going to drive him to Pocatello, Uncle Jay we take him to Boise, and Aunt Wendy will bring him the rest of the way home.
Today, Stacy and the kids are with the Stockwell's playing around at Great America.
Till next time,
Jason and the Oregon crew.
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6 comments:
I can't imagine how tough it must have been for both of you. Think of you daily. Prayers daily.
You guys are always in our thoughts and prayers. I don't know how you both do it. I realize you kind of have to but you amaze us with your strength. Hang in there.
Thank you for sharing that amazing tractor story. I have tears in my eyes reading it. I also have strong belief that Gage is in excellent care - the most excellent care - and surgery will go smoothly on Friday. Stay strong. Safe trip back to Palo Alto. Don't lose hope. School is starting soon and you all will be finally reunited soon at the ranch. Love and prayers, Jennifer cavanagh
Your kids are adorable, love the cute pictures of Gage. What a touching moment with Gage, thanks for sharing it. Our prayers are with you.
😥Bless Gage... Thank God for tractors...🙏.
What a brave little boy. I just want to give him a big hug. And you too! I hope I get to see you next year. We enjoyed seeing your parents so much when they came up to Washington. Love janelle
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